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Wednesday, May 11, 2005

To be there for a cuppa coffee...

Is rather difficult, if you aren't gonna answer my calls or my SMSes. *hmph*

Schedules are a double-edged sword. On the one hand, you hate answering to them. You hate the control they have over your life. You hate the fact that you have to be at so-so's house at so-so time every so-so day, whether you feel like it or not. You want to be free to go where you want, without a schedule holding you down.

Then on the days that your schedule is taken away, you feel strangely lost.

That's what happened to me tonight. My regular Wed nite student decided to take a break from her exams, and so I'm free on Weds now till June. Which at first, seemed like a good thing. I'd have Wed nite free to go out, meet friends, and stay out late.

Until tonight, when I got soooooooooooooo bloody bored after dinner.

And as if boredom wasn't enough, I kept getting insistent alarms from my body clock, trying to tell me I had to be going somewhere, I had to be doing something, I had to do SOMETHING other than lie languidly on my bed wondering what to do.

How does one rest when one is so restless? It was as if my body was trying to get the engine started, when I hadn't even read the map and decided on the directions yet.

Finally I decided to take an aimless walk around J8 instead.

As your silent questions as to whether I called the DF: Yes I did, and all I got was a continuous ringing tone on his end. *hmph*

One thing you guys have to know about the DF: He is NOT a phone-friendly person. *grr* I admit, I'm not the easiest person to call on the phone. I often miss my calls and reply SMSes late.

But the key difference is: I REPLY them. He doesn't. (^^!) He often misses calls and SMSes, and if he realises it too late, ie hours later, he decides it's too late liao and doesn't reply.

[mutters silent curses under her breath]

Most of you have heard the Rules. Rule 1: All men lie. Rule 2: [amidst a male chorus of "NO WE DON'T!"] If they say they don't, they're in denial. Hehehehe....

All women know about the rules and expect men to abide by them. No men knows all the rules, and they are obligated to abide by them.

No wonder we have so many mars-venus problems.....

So maybe I should add Rule 3: Men must ALWAYS answer their GF's calls and SMSes, even if it be days later.

Rule 4: For any reply that is more than 1 hour late, the girl is no longer obligated to reply the men's calls/SMSes. However, the man is obliged to keep trying, until the girl feels he is worthy of her reply.

You guys realise I'm only writing this because I'm half hoping he still isn't reading my blog... hahaha...

After coming home, and claiming the PC as mine, I finally managed to come online, read blogs, and blog a bit myself. [and at the same time, realising that a certain malaise seemed to be making its way through my friends, wonder why...]

What caught my eye was this line from an name-shalt-be-unmentioned friend:

"Do u ever wonder?

Is your other half really suitable for you?"

Considering that she's been seemingly happily attached for almost 6 months now, I'm wondering why she's writing this line in her blog, but well, here's my thought on the matter.

Can anyone ever be 100% suitable for another? Can anyone ever perfectly 'click' with another?

Suitability, compatibility, love... As I told another friend another time, true love is something that is tested over time, fire and water.

How do you tell whether someone really loves you? When we are [relatively] rich, young, and [relatively] beautiful, it's easy for us to tell each other, "Yes, I love you."

What about the opposite? Assume now that both of you are poor, old and ugly. What if one of you is dying from a dreaded disease? [fervently banging wooden table now] Or if one of you loses his/her job and can't find another, and you have 2 hungry kids to raise and your salary is not enough to feed them all? Will you, in all honesty, be able to tell each other the same thing?

True love, compatibility is not something that can be measured, quantified in the here and now. It is tested and proven through baptisms of fire.

The couple who truly loves each other is not the one who holds hands and meets each other everyday/week/month and talks to each other every day on the phone.

The ones who are truly in love are the ones who have been through hell and fire together, who have raised hellions of their own, who have lost their youth, their beauty, and every inch of firm skin or hair on their heads, and who can still look at each other fondly and say, "I love you." and mean it.

The rest of us now....... We're not in love. We're not even close to experiencing love. Even when we are in a relationship, we're not really in love, because our relationships are too young, and for most of us, in too early a dating stage to have really experienced hardships as a couple.

We're just taking a chance that, at the end of it all, it might be love. :)

As for suitability... similiarly, it's something that is cultivated over time. The more both are together, the more they learn about each other.

And in the end, I think suitability is not measured in terms of whether you can talk as well as he does, or whether he answers your calls *grr* or whether he likes your friends.

So don't measure it in terms of things like family upbringing, income, race, skin, sexual orientation, [ok, maybe you should be concerned about his sexual orientation, if you think it's headed the wrong way...] religion etc...

Suitability and Compatibility are measured in terms of how much of each other's crap you can stomach in the long run. :)

Which also means, if he doesn't answer your calls on the first go, either try again, or just walk around J8 without him, but mainly, don't hold it against him *mumble embarrassingly* 'kay fine............

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