Corpse in a Cart

and so started CSI tonight....

Tonight's ep was really... disturbing.. in a way. A model is found dead, in a shopping cart, with gaping holes in her face where the skin had been scraped out. Suspects include her model boss, a crazy ex-boyfriend, and a schizo sister.

What was the most disturbing part? When they found out at the end that the model had inflicted the injuries on herself.

Apparently the agency where she worked was an intense, high-stress environment. Too fat. Too flat. Can't fit into clothes, your fault. Eating too much. Her sister became a paranoid schizophrenic because of it. They both became hooked on coke, supplied by the boss of the model agency to keep his girls in line. Then she became bulimic anorexic. Eventually she died of a blood infection due to the, er, scraping n the constant puking. [something to that extent. sometimes I don't hear the words properly]

The really sad part is that she became so obsessed with her face in the end, she had to scrape out portions of it in order to make herself look beautiful. And that she couldn't see what a smashing beauty she really was. Contrast to hole-y face on stone cold white corpse on table of morgue. It makes you sick.

What also makes it even sicker is the ad ch5 showed after that ep, which was.... a commercial for Miss Singapore. What a bastardly piece of programme timing huh? Right after the ep when a model died because she hated her face so much, ch5 shows an advertisement for a local beauty contest. [in which the models range from pleasant, simple, man-like, and just plain bitchy looking] And then throughout the next programme, Buffy, adverts for slimming centres, facial cleansers and bust enhancements during the breaks.

Be the woman you always wanted to be.
Lose all your unsightly fat now.
Cleaner, clearer, oil-free skin.
For a shapelier bust.

Excuse the language, but this is just plain, clear fucking mad. The global obsession over how women should look is just bloody crazy enough, without all these advertisers, and slimming centres to screw our brains further. Be the envy of all the women - by having the bust of your dreams. What crock. What bull. Already we're [or rather I am] halfway neurotic about men, ticking bioclocks, menstruation and menopause for the older ones, and comes in all these people with dollar signs in their eyes, preying on our indecision and seeing our fears and worries as "opportunity".

I'm a business student. And I just hate the world of business at times like this. The one that judges people in terms of productivity, wages, numbers. The one that sees how well you fit into that $300 suit from zara. The one that looks down their noses at you because you don't wear makeup. The one that forces you to wear shoes that will trigger athritis later in life, but insists that that is the standard and that everyone has to go through this in order to "make it". The one that rewards all the young, slim chicks with smashing bods to screw for, and a face that'll sink a thousand ships, including one or two superstar virgos.

This is crazy. I'm so pissed now I barely know what to type. Who the hell came up with all these fucking rules and forced US to accept it??? Who the hell was the idiot who said that you had to be young, slim and screw-able in order to get the hot male bod who'd love you throughout life, and who doesn't care what you look, but thinks it wouldn't hurt if you try wearing a skirt once in while, just to look like a "girl".

Dammit I hate this world.