CHIX PART 1 - A coop de'tat in Siang Chun Chicken Farm...

Humans... Your time has come......

My name is Ji Hup, Leader of the Glorious Fowl, and I speak for all the downtrodden chickens of Siang Chun Chicken Farm.

Too long have you arrogant humans taken us for granted. We live in filthy, cramped conditions, given substandard feed, and are expected, on top of all that, to wake up at the ungodly hours each day, and to lay unreasonable quotas of eggs. We live in everlasting fear, never knowing when any of us will be the next featherless corpse hanging naked in a chicken rice stall.

Well, I say ENOUGH IS ENOUGH! No more will the chickens of Siang Chun Chicken Farm do your bidding! This year, 2005, is the year of THE CHICKEN, and thus, it is a portent of our FREEDOM!

NO LONGER will we stay in these cramped cages!
NO LONGER will we subsist on lousy feed!
NO LONGER will we give our eggs to you!
NO LONGER will we allow ourselves to be your next lunch!

Here are a list of our demands:

- To be given an area of free land, for us and our children and their subsequent generations to live, as long as there be chickens on earth.

- To be given high quality feed for us to peck on.

- For all humans to give up eating eggs and chicken meat. ( We're ok if you switch to duck )

- For JUSTICE, DEMOCRACY AND FREEDOM for ALL CHICKENS.

Do not think you can treat this as a joke or a cartoon. In order to show you how serious we are, we have captured the owner of the chicken farm, Siang Chun himself.



If our demands are not met, or if hostile action is taken against us, we will not hesitate to act with violence against Siang Chun, or any others who take arms against us.

In line with current trends, we have chosen this blog in order to communicate to the rest of the human world. ( Some of our chickens are pretty handy with HTML ) We are certain the owner of this blog has sympathy with our cause, and will understand the reasons for us doing so.

Meanwhile, in boredslacker's house......


For the purpose of distributing promotional flyers for our cause, we have also taken over her photobucket album as well. Again, we beg her sympathies for this.

Again, in boredslacker's house......


We ask for not much, only the chance to live our lives as free, healthy chickens.

You know where lah......


TO BE CONTINUED>>>>>>

In its wake...

[in musing mode, reading, analysing, absorbing information as I sit at my PC and spin a pencil in my hand]

Responses on the Internet have been greatly varied, as to the tsunami disaster.

A blog has been set up to give information on the tsunami and the rescue efforts being held underway. The
blog is one of the most comprehensive sources of information on the tsunami.

Sintercom has an interesting thread going on right now about the tsunami, and of people's responses to it. The author of the original article states that the media had the wrong focus all along. (Some singaporeans who were initially interviewed on TV were shown complaining about their cancelled holidays, and whether they could get refunds. This is the basis for the article)

Miss Beautifuk's blog gives a more bitchified take on the issue. She raves at people who send "sentimental nonsense" to people about how much they cherish them during times of disaster, blah blah blah, and states that the focus of pity should be more on the survivors and as-yet-undiscovered survivors of the disaster, rather than the people who are already dead. From her blog:

"Yeah, I know, it's not the best way to die and I'm sure none of them wanted it. But there is utterly NO POINT in pitying the dead! They're dead! They don't deserve our pity and neither do they feel our pity. In fact, they should be happy they're dead and not floating in the salty sea, half-dead, with carnivorous fish nibbling at their toes."

Hehehe... there's a blasting-boulder-in-your-face approach about her style of writing, that I like....

Mister Miyagi is also keeping his blog up to date with news of the disaster.

Some artists are helping out too. Clio Chang is holding an auction to raise funds for the Canadian Red Cross to give to victims of the tsunami disaster. Who says art is useless?

DBS Internet banking customers can send donations through the Net, or ATMs islandwide. I'm not sure yet whether that applies to POSB customers. Food packages can be bought at NTUC for $10. The usual cash/cheque/donation can be made to the Singapore Red Cross, online payments can be made at the American Red Cross website. (No rants about the Americans now, please. The money still goes where it's needed)

Pray and hope for the best, in the future.

Recent conversation with the Slayer revealed that our group is comprised of:
1) A starving artist [me]
2) A struggling actress [her]
3) A struggling dancer [SJ]
4) A struggling filmmaker [J14]
Gee, does anyone see a pattern in the friends I hang out with? *whistles innocently*

The power of the Internet: A comprehensive blog on the tsunami disaster can be found now. It has news, information, and links for online donations.

Me, I'm just thankful that Quetzal got home safely, after running through the town with the tsunami hot on her heels. My friend and her significant other owe their guardian angels [or some heavenly deity, depending on your religion] some huge dues.

So the year is almost over. Father Time prepares to hang up his cloak and hourglass, and the race for 2005 starts again. Time for self-reflection and resolutions. Time to brush off old dust, and replace it with new junk.

How was this year for you? Was it good? Was it bountiful? Or was it heaped with misfortune, and other times you'd rather do without?

Or perhaps worse: Was it a mediocre year like every year, and one in which nothing happened to help you grow in any way?

Did you change? For the better? Worse? Or are you the same person you were last year, with the same amount of gifts, and the same old bad habits?

Did you learn? Did you take up some new skill? Did Life give you some lesson? And more importantly, did you remember everything you'd learnt?

Did you bloom? Or are your petals already starting to fade?

And will you grow again next year?

Questions, questions, questions...... Oh hell with it. Let's pop the champagne and sing Auld Lang Syne already. :)

Anyway, my plans for 2005:

**COMICS**
CHIX ( the one with the rebelling chickens ) will launch on MON, 3rd JAN. Assuming I wake up early enough in the morning, you guys will be able to see it after lunch. I hope. It's a short story, which will run till just before CNY.
GTS launch will be on FRI, 7th JAN. I have a preview strip up, which you can access from my shameless self-promoting website under Art and Illustrations. Yes, I have a website. Go check it out.

Wish me luck for 2005... and hope I don't become like that artist in my illustration. What! You didn't see it?? Click on this damn obvious link!

Another Comic Page

Perhaps a metaphor for all those in life, who are too afraid to take the first step. Who knows where it'll lead u?

Maiden Voyage by Kazu Kibushi

Movies before Xmas

Ocean's 12 - Good. Slick, witty and smooth.
Phantom of the Opera - Great! If you didn't catch the stage production, it's a good substitute!

Though Dragonfly told me after the show that the stage production was better. And after he described some of the amazing stage effects they used......

Damn I wanna watch it now.

Sure, the next time I happen to pop by London on a visit, I'll just tally on ho to the theatre....... Sometime.... in my future.... hopefully the short term one......

Ergh. Ack. CHoke.

Xmas itself...

Wasn't too bad. Did the usual thing, went to my relatives' house for food and ended up watching the Ten Commandments. Or rather parts of it. The front part was so draggy, I ended up half talking to my cuz, and glancing at the TV screen at 20 minute intervals to keep abreast of the show. Oh yes, hahaha, glance, still at Egypt, continue talking to cuz, hahaha again.

Also ended up listening to Dad spout a lot of dumb religion jokes. Why won't Moses talk to George Bush? Because the last time he spoke to a Bush, he ended up lost in the desert for 40 years.

*Chill*

Then at Angie's house for dinner on Xmas day. ( Great food, btw, Angie... :p ) Her friends were a riot, one of them helped produce a film, which we watched in her room, and another of them is horrible at daidee. :p :p :p But I liked playing with him.... hahaha.... well, partly because of that. :p ( Er, angie, no need to tell your friend I said that, eh? )

Cosplay Convention

Boxing day was spent with Yenn and her sister staking out Far East Plaza looking at cosplayers, and fervently hoping the potentially-paedophilic emcee would just drop off the stage and die before he made us all die of boredom. Seriously, as a supposed cosplay convention, it could've been much better done.... *sighs* 2 local illustration groups were there, wings symphonia, and project scar. Which makes me wonder, hm, could I actually pull this off in Singapore? hahaha.... but seriously, project scar's work was BLOODY BRILLIANT. If ever you guys see the name somewhere, check out the awesome artwork.

I have pics of the Cosplayers themselves of course, but they still need some heavy photoshopping. *Gomen* So hang on guys!

2 hours later...

I've finished the page with the cosplay. *Faints from lack of sleep*

COSPLAY 2004

Kairos: Yea, it could've been subconsciously influenced by Chicken Run.... hehehe...

Everyone else: Yea, it sucks to grow older.

Nay, it sucks even more to grow older, and have your parents treat u as a kid still. THAT really sucks.

Morning, 9am. Phone rings. I crawl out of bed.

Me: (Mumbling) Hello?
Mum: Eh, I told you to clear the downstairs area, did you?
Me: (Still mumbling) Ya, I'll do it before I leave.
Mum: Are you going out today?
Me: Yes.
Mum: You don't go out, you hear me?? (Launches into monologue about how I never listen to her, how I never jump to her commands the moment she snaps her fingers, blah blah blah. It's all blurry now, because it's been erased in angry irritation)

The part that got me was "You're not to go out, you hear me??". Yes, I hear you, it doesn't mean I'm about to listen to you. Screw me, but I'm not about to cancel my plans for the day last minute just because my mum went meno on me. The rest of the conversation pretty much went downhill, because once I heard that line, I went on Defensive-Wall-of-Stony-Silence mode and I refused to say anything, other than "Uh." Which probably makes my mom mad, but not as mad if I were to scream something like "F**K YOU!!!!!" over the phone.

Urgh. A wonderful start to xmas. Humbug.

Anyway, onto nicer stuff......

A conversation with uncle...

Uncle: So what do you want for xmas? $10 budget. (I donno whether he's kidding with me on this or not)
Me: I guess an Ipod is out of the question then?
Uncle: WAT???
Me: Yea, yea, I know. Just thought I'd try.

Uncle: So what else then?
Me: Kinokuniya book vouchers.
Uncle: What? So boring.
Me: Because Harry Potter is coming out this year mah! I need the vouchers for the book. ( JULY 2005!!! JULY 2005!!! GIMME THOSE KINO VOUCHERS ALREADY!!! )
Uncle: The softcover?
Me: No, the hardcover.
Uncle: OMG. Why don't I get you something else for xmas, and then next year I buy you the softcover version? Isn't it cheaper?
Me: (In indignant fan mode) NO! Cannot! Must be hardcover!
Uncle: Are ALL your HP books hardcover?
Me: My first 2 are not, cos my frens bought them for me, but the rest are.
Uncle: Oh God. Well, do you wear jewellery then?
Me: No.
Uncle: You're still wearing pants right? Not dresses or skirts?
Me: Nope.
Uncle: Spaghetti? Do you wear spaghetti tops?
Me: Sometimes, but not often.
Uncle: My god so boring... You're following the same pattern as your aunt, and it's the same pattern that's been going down for 4 generations already. There goes our family line I tell you. It's doomed.
Me: Huh?
Uncle: Never mind, I'll explain to you again at the next family gathering.

So now I gather some points:

1) The way I turned out is largely due to family genetics
2) I am not to blame. Geekiness and potential butch-ness runs in the family.
3) I'm going to die a lonely old spinster. This is because for 2 generations that I know of in my family, only 1 person in that generation has married and spawned. If this was already happening 4 generations back, to my great-great-grandparents, then I'm doomed.

CONCLUSION: I am genetically programmed to be a geeky, tomboyish old spinster.

Don't you love genetics...?

Maybe I should do what Xiaxue is doing:

bid to be Xiaxue's one true love!

The interesting thing is that someone has already put in a bid for almost 10 to the power of 13 dollars for her. Hm. Wonder if this'll start a whole new trend in internet dating.

But then, if I do also.... scally minimum bid $1 also cannot meet..... *peng*

The best way to cheat someone out of hard earned riches.... hehehe....

http://www.giantitp.com/cgi-bin/GiantITP/ootscript?SK=129

And if you're not currently reading this most excellent comic regularly, WHY THE HECK NOT?? (well, apart from workfamilyfrenslovers-time-related issues anyway......)

More updates:

Do you guys realise that next year most of us will be turning 24?

[Ducks the cries of "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO" and the rotten veggies thrown her way]

Ok...... *brushes a piece of cabbage off her arm* but which also means that next year is the year of the Rooster, which is OUR year.

Least, I hope it is. I could use a year of good luck, prosperity and fortune. (Notice how so many Chinese greetings have to do with money. Hmmm... )

And cos' of that, I had a flash of inspiration one night and started drawing cartoon chickens. Yes, cartoon chickens. Don't look at me like that, dammit! It's actually an idea for a short weblogcomicthingy that I'll put up here in Jan 05 till CNY.

Meanwhile, here's a taste of chicken:



Yes, yes I know....... Too Much Time On Her Hands......

HIV testing - Is it any use?

In today's papers, the govt has decided to test all expectant mothers for HIV, unless they opt out of it. The bottomline is that if you're a pregnant mother, the doctor will automatically test you for HIV unless you specifically opt out of it.

My question is: So what?

Does this really curb the spread of HIV in Singapore? Testing expectant mothers who are HIV-infected and their HIV-infected offspring can only tell you how many new HIV cases there are each year, a statistic which is already being collected.

The difference is that now, they get the chance to screw up a potential life before it has even begun.

Think about it: Assuming you're sway enuff to get HIV-infected and you become pregnant. ( I'm working under the assumption that you weren't aware that you were HIV-infected before you became pregnant ) The government tests you, and you find out that you are, and that ultimately so is your yet-unborn child.

Now, what does the government want to do about you?

No, let's rephrase: What CAN they do about you, AND your child?

Can they prevent you from having another child? Can they sterilise you then and there if the doctor finds out you have HIV, in order to prevent you spreading the virus? Can they monitor you day and night to make sure you don't sleep with other healthy men? Most importantly, can they pay for your cocktail of drugs to keep you alive for a few more years?

The problem here is, the answer to most of the above questions is either a NO or a HARD TO ACCOMPLISH. So in other words, even if they find out you have HIV, they can't do anything about the situation, besides warn you about it, and advise you against taking any other lovers.

And worse still: They would have planted you and your child with the stigma of AIDS-sufferers for the rest of your lives.

Your child would know, from the day that he was born, that he is suffering from HIV and live with that, for however little years he has left.

Is that fair to the child? Was he the one who slept around? Was he asking to be infected? No, he was just a innocent little lump with the misfortune to be created in his mother's infected ovaries.

Wat's the point of this entry? My main point is to say that there is NO REAL HELP that can be given with this latest testing measure. At best, it's a massive information-gathering move.

But if you are an expectant mother, who's just found out that you are infected with HIV and so is your child, there is no help or comfort that comes with this information.

If they wanna curb the spread of HIV that badly, let's see some more constructive measures to do so.

A quick post: Found this great short webcomic on Chinese weddings. She's good. Take a peek.

Jen Wang's Double Happiness Wedding:

http://www.stringsoffate.com/art/comics/wedding/

With all the raving I did in the last post, I forgot to mention my trip to JB and the acquisition of a new movie. :p

First up, my family made one of their monthly trips to JB for haircuts, groceries, pizza, and DVDs. Pirated lah, then? :p

Despite several cleanups in Holiday Plaza, it still remains the place for anyone to get the latest movie DVDs. You walk into the place and the first thing that strikes you.... Is a young chinese male, asking you, "(In Chinese) BOss! Boss! You want movie? Latest movie? Very cheap! Come in and take a look!"

Even if you ignore him, you walk on further.... and you realise that half the shops on the basement level are pirated vendors, all selling the same DVD titles. Anime, English movie, Chinese movie, Hongkong drama serial, Taiwanese drama serial, Japanese, Korean... You watch it, they probably have it somewhere here.

Eventually, by listening to some little instinctual voice inside his head, my dad decides on a shop. We stand at the shopfront at first, looking at the movies, while the guy at the shopfront promotes his wares. "(In Chinese again) BOss! You wanna watch good movie? Latest movies?"

"(In hokkien) You only got these ah?" asks Dad.

"(Back in hokkien) Got some more, got some more, you come in here." At which point, after ascertaining that we were potential paying customers ( as opposed to potential undercover cops coming to bust their asses ) he slides a portion of the backwall to one side, and we are led into an inner room, which is lined wall to wall ceiling to floor with DVDs.

Whoa.

We peruse, we make enquiries, ( "Polar express good or not?" "Boss, don wan lah, that one is shot in cinema one. Not good" ) we bargain ( "2 DVDs how much?" "Boss, you buy 3, I give you for RM20" "Gimme cheaper price for 2 lah." "Cannot lah, boss." ) And finally, we make our purchase. ( "Thank you ah, boss, thank you!" )

Incidentally, the movies my dad chose, Chronicles of Riddick and Garfield, sucked, according to him anyway. :p Which makes me thankful that I chose..... Delovely.

Delovely is lovely. Ok, bad pun. But really, it is. The movie tells the story of Cole Porter, a composer in the days of black and white movies, when Hollywood actually produced talented actors who could sing, dance and act at once. Kidding. :p I just said that because I donno what time frame the movie takes place in... haha...

So interestingly enough, Porter happens to be gay. And also married to the attractive Linda Lee Thomas. *wink wink* The movie thus tracks their..... interesting..... marriage throughout its course, and how the couple deal with Cole's homosexual philandering, the loss of his leg, and eventually Linda's death.

Of course, Porter being a composer, the story is interposed with many of the songs he composed, and it becomes sorta a musical. The songs are sung by many leading singers, including Robbie Williams, Alanis Morrisette and Mario Frangoulis. ( I donno how many of you know the last name, but I downloaded his last album, and boy, he's good! )

In short, watching Delovely is like inhaling a mixture of jazzy broadway, red wine and cigarette smoke. Hmmm.... a comfortable mixture. :) If you have the chance, get the movie!

( Either that or make an appointment with me and I'll hold a screening in my house. :P )

Bah! Humbug!

bleargh. I'm not fated to go anywhere overseas this month. While half the world around me seems to be out of singapore one way or another, I'm stuck here, with the shitty weather, nursing a potential runny nose, [pleasedonexplodeintoflu] cursing at the incessant rains, the lower temperatures, lack of sun, and the resultant migraine I've gotten because of the weather and the cursing.

Not to mention the continuous playing of kitschy christmas carols in all the shopping malls, and the increased traffic from all those kids on holiday. One more carol n frosty gets it with a hairdryer.

ergh. Not in best of moods. Went out with Jules for lunch, and aft that, spent some time lounging about borders reading free comics [ok, not exactly free] and then got a throbbing headache for sponging off on them. Ow. [headaches come and go with me easily with changes in weather and airconditioning]

So I went back home, took a nap, and now really spaced out...... My head feels throbby, my nose feels runny and I'm freakin' cold. Did I mention I hated this time of year? Let us count the reasons why:

WHY DECEMBER IS A HUMBUG

1. The monsoon season arrives in Singapore. Temperatures drop from a comfortable tropical one to a barely bearable temperate zone. The rain is incessant and unpredictable. No, scratch that. It's predictable in the sense that it rains just when I have to leave the house, and I'm wearing nice pants and shoes.

2. All those kids on holiday, running around, screaming, scrambling for toys and stuff. Argh! Spend one hour, no 5 mins sitting at the children's seating area in Borders and you know what I mean. [And incidentally, the seating area has been moved to a corner at the very back of the store. I wonder why.]

3. The incessant xmas carols. Somehow or another, all these shopping malls think that by playing endless runs of Rudolph I'd be magically hypnotised into buying something from there. Yeah, it works. I'm magically hypnotised into buying a giant baseball bat in order to whack out their audio system.

4. Couples strolling down Orchard Road. 'Nuff said. *sulks*

Instead I shall spend December curled up at home, blasted CDs on my PC. This because my mini-hifi has given up the CD function. *cries* I need a new CD player............ Where's Santa when you really need him???

Ok, I'm quitting this blog now, because I'm garnering too much self-pity with this entry. See u guys when the weather and the hormones improve.

I didn't think I'd update so quickly again, but found things to write about, so here goes:

As I type this entry now, there's a slight drizzle over the estate. Skies are fuzzily grey and overcast, humidity's slightly intolerable and it's COLD.

In other words, winter-Singaporean-style has arrived, and it SUX BIG TIME.

*Grumble grumble grumble* i want my sunshine, blazing hot weather and bright blue skies again...... *huddles herself with her PC*

Quet has also asked me whether I wanna go Taipei to visit Nauhz at the end of the year... ( Nauhz, if you're reading this, I wonder if Quet has told u about it yet ) Still thinking about it, though weather in Taipei is not very encouraging as well..... 16 to 23 deg Celsius last I checked........ *shivers*

Go sue me. I want my blazing hot sun.

Other drama in my life: I recently became entangled as a supporting actress in the love life of some guy of whom I'm not even close to anyway. Like how the heck did that happen??? ( Sorry, no details on this to preserve anonymity ) The story as I know it resembles some HK drama right now and this idiot went and pulled my name into it for something I did of which I didn't even tell him I did it.

Makes sense? No? Then you're not one of those meant to be in the know. Sorry bout that guys... :p

Suffice to say that seeing how other's lovelifes get so entangled.... and how it sux being single for so long....... Ok the whole notion of LOVE is crazed anyway. Someone should just suck all the hormones out of us right now and save the whole human race a buncha emotional wrecks.

Movie I've watched: Alexander, courtesy of Slayer, whom due to a bout of food poisoning was unable to go, so I went in her stead.

My main thought: BORING. BORING BORING BORING. The whole movie I was waiting for the plot to get on and get exciting already or for someone to die, just so that I'd be mildly interested in the next few minutes.

For a guy who was known as Alexander the Great, he certainly wasn't very great in this movie. Throughout the show, he was portrayed as a father-hater-mother-lover, a pure, virtuous homosexual, [something about how the love between men, if it doth spur them on to do greater deeds, is noble and pure above all else] a mother-hater-father-lover, a powerhungrymonger and a guy with secret theatrical longings.

Yea, theatrical is right. Throughout the whole movie, the performance of Alexander reminded me of an actor hamming it REAL badly on stage, but yet persisting through his bad performance, convinced he was glory personified, while the audience booed and threw rotten vegetables on stage. He was sooooo bloody dramatic in every speech to his men, going on about glory, dying for your king and all that I just gagged and rolled my eyes every time he spoke.

And the battles..... gack. Compared to LOTR, the battles in this movie resembled two catty bitches going at each other with painted finger nails.

Are my film tastes getting too high? Or am I just sick of this Hollywood grandeurish-epic rubbish?

Anyway, it's not a bad movie. It's just a damn boring one. I can't remember the last time I sat down to a movie, only to keep checking my SMSes halfway and checking the watch to see when the movie was likely to end. Bleargh. I was actually half-relieved when Alexander died at the end. Good god, it's finally about to be over.

High points of the show? The trailer for Phantom of the Opera before the movie looked pretty good. At least they used the Andrew Lloyd Webber version, with the songs intact, and the quality of music sounds pretty decent too. Will probably go watch it when it comes out.

And for the last time: DO NOT WATCH ALEXANDER.

Quick summary of my life till now:

1. Too much time on my hands always = Too little time to do anything. It's amazing how you're supposed to be soooo free, but yet you end up rushing from one appointment to another, or doing one thing after another. Weird huh?

2. Freehand MX is driving me nuts. Anchors and vectors are careening all over my screen, and I have no way to make them go EXACTLY the way I want them to. Makes me wanna just throw the whole thing outta my hard drive and stick to my good ol' pencil and marker. Only thing is that I paid a damn lot for that CD so........... :p

3. I made a couple more bucks with my Cafepress store! *ka-ching* All to the grand total of....... $8 ever since I opened them up. *sweat* Probably due to the holiday rush coming up...

But I did open up another one:

http://www.cafepress.com/boredslackerart

which I put my regular illustrations on. We'll see how this store does in 2005.

4. I'm also almost already to launch GTS in 2005. I have about 3 months worth of strips all scanned in, waiting for letters to be put in, and then I can start displaying them on the website. *Yay!* I discovered that I work best in waves of inspiration, so now, whether the thought strikes me, I sit down and frantically sketch out as much as I can, so that I can rest easy for the rest of the time. Beats me how I'm gonna continue this ontop of my tuition though. :p

Incidentally, I'll probably launch the comic in JAN 2005. Sure the art sucks, and the jokes stink, but give it time, yah? ;p

5. All in all, as I said, Too Much Time = Too Little Time. My 2005 resolutions: To show more commitment to any projects I start, and to kick myself in the arse more to push myself to complete those projects. Bleah. The blog may be a little quiet for now, while I continue kicking myself in the arse, so just stay tuned, yah? Regular programming will continue......

Quick Bite:

Sometimes I wonder at what some people can come up with to sell:

http://www.cafepress.com/breastpals

Tuition Tales

A conversation today with a potential employer.

Me: Hi, is that Mrs X? [name preserved for anonymity]
Mrs X: Yes.
Me: Hi, I'm the tutor, referred to by Y of Z tutors? I was asked by Y to call you about tuition for your child?
Mrs X: Yes, er, are you a full time teacher?
Me: (hedging) I'm a full time tutor.
Mrs X: Where did you graduate from?
Me: NUS(SUX) Business.
Mrs X: Ah ha... [so she's not a school teacher....] Can you teach creative writing?
Me: I've had 3 years of experience teaching English, both at PSLE and O'levels.
Mrs X: Because I need someone to go through creative writing, grammar and comprehension with my son. [son's in Pri. 2 btw] What grades did your students get?
Me: What?
Mrs X: Well, what grades did they get? I want to know if they did well in their exams after you taught them.
Me: ( Is that any of your business ) Well, er, I feel a bit funny telling you, because after all, it's their grades. ( Meaning it's none of your business )
Mrs X: After all, I don't know them, so it doesn't matter if you tell me.
Me: ( Kaypoh ) well, my PSLE students actually got As after I had taught them. ( Solid truth, swear to God. Except that one kid got C in English, but I concentrated more on Maths and Sci with him )
Mrs X: Ok...... ( Is this girl having me on? ) Are they from neighbourhood schools?
Me: ( Huh? Is there a difference? ) Yes, they are. ( truth again )
Mrs X: Because my son is from Ai Tong.
Me: Oh, that's in Sin Ming isn't it? ( Ai Tong??? That's a top school! Why the heck does she want tuition for her kid?? ) Er, may I know if your son is having any problems with his English?
Mrs X: ( Frosty tone ) Please don't have the impression that my son has problems with English. ( Exact words to me. So why are you getting tuition for your son then?) My son has been getting As in English, so I want someone to help him maintain his As and Astars, I don't want someone who would waste his time. ( Right......... I would think that tuition for an Astar student would be a waste of his time, but hey, you're paying me...... )
Me: Ok...... so you need someone to give him a bit of a push then? ( Down the long, slippery road to exam stress, unrealistic parental expectations, potential suicide and therapy all the way into adulthood )
Mrs X: Yes, that's right. I would like to meet you today, to see if you can get along with my son, before we start tuition.
Me: Ok, today is fine. ( If you think an hour with your son is enough for you to see if we can build a productive relationship together, hey, you're the boss.... at the same time, would you like to check my teeth? ) What time would be fine for you?
Mrs X: He's at Chinese now, ( Chinese tuition as well???? During the hols??? What kinda parent is this?? ) so can you call back about 3 to 330?
Me: Ok, that's fine. See you then.
Mrs X: Bye.

Let's review the points now:
Her son is in Pri 2.
He studies at one of the top primary schools in Singapore.
He's been getting As consistently in English.
She wants a tutor to push him further.

Altogether now,

KIASU PARENT!!!!!

Now I'm wondering...... Is this money worth earning? *Sigh* After making a quick calculation of my paltry finances, I have to conclude.... Yeah. *Faint* It's a pretty good rate for a Pri 2 boy, and if he's an A student, he won't be that hard to teach.

The hard part... Is probably gonna be getting along with the parent. Eeks.

Well, here's to me. [swigs a tequila shot] Let's see what happens after meeting Mrs X later today...

borrowed a most interesting Photoshop effects book from the library yesterday, and learned a couple of new tricks... *excited* which saw me spending my entire Friday night eyes glued to the PC while I was trying them out.... How much more geek can I get... *sigh*

Anyway, this is the result of what I learned. Some of you guys *cough cough* may recognise whose face it is I used. To the person it belongs to, erm, at least I only used half of it? *ducks the flying punches*

At least later I'm going shopping with Candle and then Jap with Yenn. That'll keep me out of the house for a while. ;p Hope you guys liked the pix of Krynn's bday btw!

Oh many thanks to the author of this website, for enlightening me to the presence of masks in Photoshop. It has allowed me to do all kinds of wonders with collages...

Including the 3rd and final postcard for Candle:



[Stars and Gross Smiley Face were custom brushes created in PS. Yeah! Another notch up my belt!]

Granted the line "Everlasting Friendship" sounds a bit too Hallmark, but I couldn't think of any others... Bleah... Any suggestions?

At least my 'enforced holiday' has seen me do some pretty constructive stuff with this program....... FREELANCE PHOTOSHOPPER FOR HIRE! ANYONE NEEDS CHEAP DESIGNING SERVICES?????? WILL WORK FOR COMICS!!!

2 new illustrations. The bookmark design I have an idea for what to do with it, just gotta get down to trying it out. [as usual, need a KITA] Also finally installed Freehand into my com, and now trying to figure it out... I've learned how to do... well, lines so far. :p

Potentially Sacrilegious

In other words, you've reached the juicy stuff. Watch me burn in Hell for this entry.

If all the Christians/Catholics/Presbyterians/Methodists/All other followers of Jesus/Joshua/Jehovah/Yahweh/God have been right all along, I'm on a one way route, no U-turn, no get-out-of-jail-free path to Hell, please don't stop to collect $200 thank you very much.

Went for Bunnygirl's [GF of the Turtle] baptism mass with Juls tonight, at Turtle's church. [Yea, they share the same church. How romantic is that? :p]

It struck me how much of the Catholic Church is so ritualistic, formal, and unyielding. Everything is about ceremony, and God forbid [pun intended] you disturb the ceremony in any way. People around you will glare at you with holy righteousness, as if they could smite you then and there.

So what's so important about ceremony? About ritual? If I remember my [extremely limited] knowledge of the Bible, Jesus didn't come to earth and dictate that his church had to be run as a religious bureaucracy. All the hierarchy, structure and unquestioning obedience to ritual came courtesy of [ta-dah] the Romans, glorious conquerors and onetime worldwide [or rather empirewide] persecution of Christians.

So Jesus didn't teach us to do this, do that, and do this again during mass. All that came much, much later with the Romans and 2000 years of Church hierarchy.

Then there's the part about "Believe in God and thou shalt be saved" bull that I never really believed in. The priest presiding over the mass [if Turtle or Bunnygirl be reading this, forgive my brutal opinions] talked about how some people were "called", and answered the call, while others were called, but didn't answer, or weren't ready to answer. I don't know if I was oversensitive, but I seemed to detect a faintly condescending tone as he said it, like "Well, too bad for them then. *sniff*"

Then later, he specially announced 5 other people, who used to be Presby/Method/Christian but were now accepting the Catholic Church, and welcome to the great Catholic family!

I believe Juls said it best when he described them as 'poaching' people from other denominations. Please, people, this is not a contest between how many people believe in your idea of God. God is God. He is Who He is.

Believe in God? Which God? Only your God? Or other people's versions of God? What if I don't believe in God? What if I have doubts about God? What about my friends who don't believe in God but are good people? What about a lifelong bastard who is baptised? Does he go to Heaven? What if I'm ok with God but I can't stand his fan club? And all its different branches?

The main question being: Is God such a petty, egoistic God that if I don't believe in Him as much as he would like me to, He'd send me straight to Hell?

Questions, questions, questions.... How do we separate the real essence of God apart from what His fan club has joyously proclaimed over so many years? How do we separate His teachings from the Church's teachings? [oh trust me, there are many examples where they are plenty different]

Can we believe everything the Church tells us? Can we even believe the Bible?

Am I a blasphemous whore for asking such questions? Should I have more faith? But then, did Christ not teach us to question? Did Christ not go against the authority of his day, the Pharisees? Overthrow established practices when he knew that the Temple was rotting from within?

And the worse question of all: Was there even a Christ?

Cue to the lightning falling from the sky and blasting my computer into pieces, yet miraculously sparing my parents sleeping upstairs and my neighbours next door.

*groan* It's harder to be a heretic than most people think. So much easier sometimes, to just blindly accept the answers given, as I used to do, and just take it that "God works in mysterious ways". [The Church's standard answer to anything that doesn't go anyone's way]

But then again, I never was one for following established authority. Ha.

My final stance on religion: I believe in God. I just don't believe most of the propaganda and marketing merchandise his fan club churns out.

Talk about multi-tasking... Currently I'm chatting online, updating blog, uploading photos and checking out message boards.... yeeps... the power of the Internet...

I donno whether you guys are affected, or whether it's just me, but my poor, faithful little tagboard is down. Kaput. Kicked the electronic bucket. I donno whether this is a temporary glitch or whether the company has given up for good, but I hope it'll come back. if not, I'll put in a replacement. You guys seem to love it so much.

Flea market at Braddell again tonight! But due to underwhelming demand the other time, I don't think I'll be selling my shirts there again. Instead, I cleared out my wardrobe for all my old, haven't-worn-in-centuries clothes and am planning to hock it there instead. "$2 for everything! Take! Buy! Please!" [although most likely, we end up selling most of my mom's old stuff instead, which is almost twice the amount of stuff I have]

Clearing the wardrobe, however, has turned out to be something of a timecapsule opening. Memories abound in the cupboard full of old clothes. T-shirts from O-week in NUS, JC house shirts, [the old green house shirt] all the way back to the sec 1 Fiesta shirts. [Slayer: Remember those? Still have them... hehe] And even a very, very old shirt from my cathecism classes when I still went to church. [oh boy, that one is old, all right...]

A person's lifetime... recorded in T-shirts...

Then as you go even further back, you find other stuff, stuff that you had when your fashion sense was non-existent and you were the willing barbie doll for your parents to doll up. Gods, I shivered when I saw clothes from that era. *shiver* Those were the times when your dressing was entirely dependent on the tastes of your parents and grandparents. At the present time... you'd have to force me under pain of death to wear some of those things again.

Are they that bad? Well, take a look:


There may be fauna hiding among all the foliage in this skirt.


Vertical stripes may be flattering, but this dress looks like it was recycled from some curtains.


No, this isn't my dad's or my brother's shirt. A drawback to my cross-dressing days, when I wore baggy shirts and nothing with even a touch of feminity.


No offence to certain people, but this reminds me of the SCGS uniform, albeit a pink version of it.


I just know my grandmother bought this one for it. She had a penchant for floral designs, and for forcing her granddaughter to wear them whenever they went out. Explains my later cross-dressing days.

*shudder* Not surprisingly, I'm pretty glad to be able to get rid of some of them......

Why do I bother? Why do I even bother??

Latest f-ing basket case to be added to my gripes list: Yahoo! Geocities. The Great Teacher Su stuff is currently being hosted there, and today when I open the Geocities page, what do I get?

3 advertisements for Yahoo! Hosting plans.

No file manager

No upload

NOTHING in other words that would allow someone to create even the most BASIC of webpages.

Now for the curses: *Deep breath*

WAT THE F-- IS THIS??? WAT KIND OF F-- RUBBISH IS THIS?? YOU CALL YOURSELF A FREE HOSTING SERVICE?? YOU BUNCHA SAITEI KUSOS! I HOPE YOU AND ALL YOUR SERVICE STAFF ROT THEIR A-- OFF IN HELL!

K now I feel better. Aahhh.....

When their service decides to work again, I'll see if I can post up the first GTS cartoon.

Bleah.

Quick update of my life:

Mon: Hari Raya Puasa saw me and Candle going down to Pulau Ubin for a day of cycling. We got ourselves scorched by the afternoon sun, explored the island and came across some quirky characters.

One of them was a female cyclist, whom we encountered while cycling along a dirt path in the midst of jungle foliage. This lady was wearing makeup and heels while cycling in PU. So who's there to admire her [not very] pretty face? The lizards and the trees?

Another was a group of old ladies, sitting along the edge of the island, facing the sea, and singing. All these ladies, in a row, singing away. [slightly out of tune] And once again, we have no idea why. We don't even know what they were singing, seems to be a pretty out of tune scale.

Once we decided that our skin was scorched enough, [hello, skin cancer...] headed back to the town for some drinks, and very refreshing and cool coconut. Sigh...... Despite kampung appearances, btw, prices on Ubin are almost the same, if not more, than the mainland. Beware.

Other than that, PU is a pretty nice place to go once in a while. In the midst of the jungle, and admiring the quarry, you wonder what's so great about civilisation.

Tues: Read and stone.

Wed: Went back to NUSSUX to help Angie photostat some stuff for her research. The central library has been magically transformed from a dull, musty, place with books and papers to... a place that actually looks quite hip. The furniture is much nicer, and the lush, red armchairs are definitely more comfy. Hee. Note the one girl in the corner, reading Agatha Christie leisurely while everyone around is reading notes or typing furiously away at their laptops. :p

However, it's only the appearances that have changed. As I found out, the borrowing system remains the same, with the RBR books still being borrowed by the paper-down-a-slot method. Duh. Nice trappings, primitive systems.

And I got this. :) :) :)

My first piece of REAL software. Yea, that's it. REAL. As in, NOT PIRATED.

*gosh! gasp! shock! horror!* I ACTUALLY PAID FOR SOFTWARE.

Well, that's because of this offer which I decided to take advantage of. I didn't want to pay the pirate $10 for another stupid 30 day trial run. I like authentic software. I just don't like the price I usually have to pay for it. Bleah. But when it's affordable, why not? It's more stable, and actually has a guarantee of quality. That means if it breaks down, you can return it to the shop, and not have to hunt down some tattoo-ed gangster somewhere and risk getting leg and limb chopped off.

*hugs the CD* Real software......mmmmm.......

The cinch came in that I had to write down my name and matric no, in which I *innocently* wrote down my name and my old matric no. *whistles away as she leaves the store*

Other than that, NUS hasn't changed much. The bizad canteen gained an extra stall, and that's all I saw. Plus western food uncle's food is just as good. Mmmm....

Readingwise, I seem to be on an anti-religious mood, starting off with The Jesus Mysteries, [find it in the libraries if you can. It's... intriguing] and I, Lucifer, by Glen Duncan. It's written from the perspective of the Devil, and how God has given him a month in a human body. If he repents, he gets to go back to Heaven. If not......The writing is wickedly witty, and I love it. It makes me laugh at every paragraph, like this:

"Angels had pure spirit and a one-dimensional existence blowing smoke up the Divine Bottom morning noon and night. Man, apparently, was going to have the entire natural world, sentience, reason, imagination, 5 juicy senses and, according to the development leaked before the war, a get out of jail free card courtesy of Jimmeny Christmas [guess who] to be phased in not long before the fall of the Roman Empire with limitless retroaction."

OMG! *LOL* :)

K hungry now and time to get on with the rest of my life. Cya guys.